So much for being a stepford wife…

One of the very first Blogs I ever found and fell in love with was www.Thisismommyhood.com.

Her name is Elle and she is a mother to a toddler who is like a hummingbird on crack. Her blog title made me howl with laughter and her humorous and beautiful way with words had me hooked from day dot. It was her, amongst few others, that inspired me to start this blog. It was Elle that taught me it was ok to admit to being a little less than perfect, it was Elle that taught me that being a little less than perfect could be great reading! Today I am lucky enough to add to my blog,  a guest post from Elle herself.  Visit Elle’s  blog over at www.thisismommyhood.com. ENJOY!!

  So much for being a stepford wife. I’m as undomestic as they come….

When I was younger I thought when I got married and had kids I would be Martha Stewart before I knew Martha existed. I thought I would always have dinner ready when my husband got home from work. I thought I would be a cleaning goddess and everything would sparkle like a Mr. Clean commercial.

I thought I would be crafty and teach myself to knit, learn how to use a sewing machine and make my future kids costumes for Halloween and school plays. I thought I would be a perfect hostess to friends while making an effortless meal without breaking a sweat.

I thought I would be perfectly dressed, not a hair out-of-place, make-up always flawless. I thought every word that would come out of my mouth would be kind and encouraging to my husband. I thought my MIL and I would be best friends (okay that might be pushing it). Oh, the beauty of only being 10 years old when I thought these things. 😉

I guess I thought I would be some pod person, some stepford wife, some robot. Then I got married over 15 years ago and reality set in. If your trying to do the math, I’m 24 years old…..in my dreams. Try as I might, and I do try, I can’t cook if my life depended on it. I found out very quickly that I hate cooking. The microwave and I have developed a very special bond over the years.

I like things to be clean yet I’m not a cleaning goddess by any means. I tried to teach myself to knit years ago. That lasted, um, maybe a week. I still have an interest in learning to sew but right now I don’t even know where I’d find the time with a toddler.

After several years of marriage we’ve only had friends over TWICE for dinner. The first time my hubby did the cooking. He also accidentally set plastic wrap on a burner that was on….I can still smell it. The second time, I did the cooking and made a Mexican feast.

To put it bluntly, it sucked balls. The dinner I made was fine but most of the time that our friends were over, I was stuck in the kitchen all sweaty and cursing like a sailor. It was definitely not the nice, relaxing evening with friends that I had hoped it would be.

I spend most of my days, not in perfect outfits, but in yoga pants and a t-shirt. Sometimes it’s a shirt and my pajama boxers. Those are the days when even yoga pants are a little too fancy schmancy for me. When it comes to wearing make-up, Ha! I’ve only worn it once in the past couple of months.

I do take some time to do my hair or I just feel blah all day. I have naturally wavy hair and if I just blow-dry it I look like Bozo the Clown so I have to straighten it too. Even by putting in my best efforts, I usually have a bad hair day most days.

There are times when my husband annoys me to the core of my being and I say things to him that I regret as soon as they come out of my mouth. We don’t fight very often but when I try to discuss something with him, it’s like talking to a brick wall.

I always tell him I’m sorry but that’s not good enough for me. I need to work on keeping the snarky remarks to myself. Better yet I should just put them on twitter. 😉 When we do argue (meaning me arguing and the hubby just standing there with a blank look on his face) it’s about pretty typical things when it comes to a couple who’s been married for over 15 years.

The longer that we’re together, the better our relationship becomes so I think that’s a very good sign. We’re both improving. A lot of the relationships I saw when I was younger consisted of yelling matches and marriage getting worse year after year. I actually used to think that’s the way relationships were supposed to be.

When it comes to my MIL, I’ve pretty much given up. I know that the relationship she had with her mother-in-law was really bad. My husband has told me how things were usually very cold between them. What’s ironic is I feel my MIL is basically treating me how her MIL treated her and she doesn’t even seem to realize it.

She actually commented before about how she doesn’t understand MIL drama and that she’s so easy to get along with. I just nodded and on the inside I was laughing my ass off. I still am.

When my husband’s grandmother was alive I would hear how she made my MIL feel bad. Then my MIL would tell me how frustrating it was. Um, hello? She questions everything I do and puts me down. It’s more like she body slams my feelings. So for now things are civil but I do wish she could treat me with just a little decency.

I’m a less than perfect cook who loves yoga pants sans doing the actual yoga, who’s never going to like cleaning and can’t sew, who sometimes lashes out at my husband and whose relationship with my MIL is lacking.

I still have issues with not being the perfect phucking stepford wife but it’s something I’m becoming okay with. What’s made me realize I need to accept who I really am is my daughter. She doesn’t care about all of those other things. She just wants love and cuddles. And whatever I have on my plate therefore leaving me hungry most of the time.

What’s something you thought you would do differently?

Advertisements

One Comment on “So much for being a stepford wife…

  1. Pingback: Thanksgiving is Gonna Rock Me Like A Hurricane. A Hurricane That Is Insulting And Has No Tact. But A Hurricane Nonetheless. Part 2 | This Is Mommyhood

Ah go on go on go on - reply?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

whocareswhatithinkanyway

Reviews, news and immaterial opinions...

CHOL PALAI

Tales of Travel

Mr Oliver.

Gaming, Music & Movies

biffandkate

parenting anxiety panic love laughter

Madre se aprende

Porque nadie nació sabiendo

A Box of Fluffies

The fluffy and not so fluffy of mummyhood: Memoirs and musings

Victorian Mini

Adventures in Modeling

feeding my intolerant child

Overcoming the challenges of food intolerance

The Tipsy Runner

One step at a time.......

Mum Muddling Through

Mum with more questions than answers

madchesh

The ravings of a Gay man with a personality disorder and HIV. I'm a catch!

Pets & Mental Health

Life, Mental Health, Anxiety, Depression, Health, Family, Knitting, Crochet, oh and pets! Lots of Pets! <3

Not Another Mum and baby group

A place for mums to get together for support and socialising

meandmegirl

Me & Me Girl (MG) on a mission to change the world, one bit at a time...

Days in Bed

Written By A Mother WIth Chronic Illness

scar

where three roads meet, there she is standing

Dad Without A Map

Unwrapping parenthood one nappy at a time

Weight Watchers Vegetarian

Vegetarian and vegan recipes and ideas for following Weight Watchers UK

improperly forward

A WORLD OF BEAUTIFUL CONTRADICTIONS

Sarsm's Blog

Quest for humour in my existence

Theplumbum's Blog

Stuff and me

julius22193

keep going

Be Like Water

Music, Film and Life

A Cornish Mum

Cornwall, Lifestyle, Parenting, Type 1 Diabetes Blog

Dear Mummy Blog

The travellings of Baby Isabella

Big Red Carpet Nursing

Fun & Progress!

Bipolarparent's Blog

Bipolar, Parenting, social services involvement but mostly me

Right from the Start

Play, Early Education and more...

HonieMummy Blog

The ramblings & goings on of the HonieHouse, HonieKitchen & HonieLikes

Tales from inside

Our family life

Oscar Relentos

Welcome to my catharsis

VAGABOND CITY

A digital space feat. poetry, art, nonfiction, interviews, and reviews by marginalized creators.

ScouseDad

Ey Ey Ey Calm Down!!!

Long Distance Daughter

Support on the journey of caring for aging parents

Doodlemum

a day in the life of my sketchbook...

A Mum on a Mission

ONE MUM'S BLOG OF HOW HER WORLD GOES ROUND!

Nothing But Words & Wine

Often Wine Sodden, always Emotional musings of a single Mummy sinking under the housework.

Mum on the brink

Parenting, travel and technology... and more

Living otherwise

another view on how we make it up

A Write Relief... (for PND)

A thirty-something mum's journey through postnatal depression... and beyond!

Typecast

Just another WordPress.com weblog

%d bloggers like this: